As a babysitter there are certain rights implied that I have, or anyone for that matter. One such right would be the right of privacy. When I go babysitting, I bring with me a little pocketbook with my cell, keys, and calender.
Then if my phone would ring, I would go get it and see who called, and then sometimes answer. Then the kids would see which pocket the phone was in. They know that phones have cameras in them and that it takes pictures. So the first time they asked if they can take a picture with my phone. So I let them. But then once I let them once they figure it means they can use it whenever they want. So they would go into my bag and take out the phone and start pressing buttons and taking pictures. It was an old phone and I figured they can't cause much harm to it. So I would let them.
But then, if the mother is home and she sees her kids going through my pocketbook and taking out my phone and using it without permission, she would tell them they are not allowed to do that. That you don't go through other peoples things, which is true. So I let her tell them that without correcting her and telling her that I don't mind. For the purpose of parenting, so that they will listen to their mother.
Now, yesterday the kids wanted to play a game that was in the closet. One kid said its supposed to be a prize for when their tooth falls out. So I told them we can't play with it then, that its supposed to be a prize. But then the kids wanted to play with it anyways, and I figured its not causing any harm, so I took the game down and taught them how to play. Then the kids started whining and being impatient, because it was a 2 people game, so one of them was left out. The game was checkers, and they didn't understand that you can only jump if there is a piece to jump over, and that you can only move one piece at a time. So they were fed up with the rules. So the mother told them to stop whining, that they won't be able to play the game like that.
The kid started crying when her mother said she had to clean up the game and can't play. So I was listening to the mother and told the kid she's not allowed to play and that we have to clean up. But she cried harder, so I figured the rest of the kids found something else to do and were quiet, so I could play with her. So we set up the game again and I played with her. Then after the game the kid started smelling what will be for dinner, and she liked the smell, so she ran up to her mother as if she hadn't been misbehaving before and gave her mother a hug and said thank you for making her favorite supper. The mother accepted the hug but told her that she has to stop having temper tantrums and expecting me to give in, she said its not nice and that now she has to apologize to me, and she said that really they weren't supposed to be playing the game because it was for a treat.
Now this causes a few reactions from me, a whole mumble jumble of thoughts. I never think negative of the mother, and I always think that she doesn't mean to offend me whenever she says anything. So when the mother said the kid had to apologize to me, again I didn't expect an apology or anything and I understand its the way of kids. But then when she says that they weren't supposed to be playing the game. In a way it implies that I shouldn't have brought the game down to let them play with it. As a negative thing on my part, but yet I know she didn't mean it that way. But still I want to do what the mother says. So then other times I say "no" to the kids, and follow what the mother says. But then it gets the kids all upset and everything, and sometimes its just not worth it. As long as its not a bad or dangerous thing, then I would give in to them.
Then there's also the right to personal space. As a babysitter I don't feel like this right is necessary. I let the kids sit on my lap or play with my hair. A lot of times they ask me to pick them up and carry them. So of course once I carry one of them, the others also wants a ride, so I have to do each one, so then it could get out of hand and I put a limit. But then if its only one kid that wants me to carry them, then I would. The mother would tell the kid not to make me carry her around all day. Which again is a valid concern, but again I didn't mind. So I wasn't gonna put the kid down the second the mother said that, but I wasn't gonna answer back either. So I would carry her to where she was going, and then put her down and say "no more".
Parshas Netzavim–Vayeilech - *Something to say* *Gather together the people – the men, the women, and the small children (31:12).* In this parshah we learn about the commandment of ...
6 years ago